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Post by Deleted on Nov 12, 2018 16:31:34 GMT -8
An Iphone feed comes on the airways following Survival of the Fittest. Moxie Monarch is seen holding the Bumbshell Championship in one hand and a lighter in the other as the focus zooms out. Moxie tosses the Bumbshell Championship over into the dumpster then turns to the camera. Since I'm the one who was stuck with the trash, I took it out for you lazy fucks. Don't worry, I completely understand why I was given this sad excuse for a championship, you expected me to carry it around and give it meaning again. Fat chance. Not only does it smell like donut holes thanks to Todd, but it also carries no meaning thanks to this sad excuse for a management team. Don't worry, I did give it a home like the little stray it is and I'm sure it won't be left out in the cold.
Moxie smiles before flicking the lighter so a flame ignites. She looks at it before winking at the camera and setting the dumpster ablaze. Moxie turns back around with her arms crossed over her chest. Like I said more than fucking once in my promos, I don't want the leftovers that no one cares about. I had to deal with some bitch who didn't know what she was talking about leading up to this pay-per-view and how am I repaid? With TRASH. I put my all into that stupid match on a pay-per-view I didn't even care about and how was I repaid? With the stray, everyone keeps kicking out on the street.
But you know what I learned after walking out with trash? The rules don't matter here. You're promised something for all your hard work but that doesn't mean management has to deliver their promises. It's like telling someone "Hey, you won a vacation but you have to pay for the plane ticket to get to your destination." How cute.
So as far as I'm concerned, I'm not a champion because I would rather be just another face on the roster than be given something that is a joke. Good job Bobby boy. Now either go by a new bumbshell championship and give it to a pathetic chump or give me something that is actually worth holding.
Moxie blows a kiss to the camera before flicking her hair over her shoulder and leaving the camera running on the dumpster.
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Post by Vinnie Lane on Nov 14, 2018 6:36:31 GMT -8
Vinnie rolls by, his Segway purring as it carries him and his 72 ounce Big Gulp up to the burning dumpster.
"Whoa."
He stands and watches as the flames leap higher and higher, filming the entire thing on his cell phone (a Pixel 2, because iphones are for bitches) so he can upload it to his Facebook story later. Yes, most people use Instagram. Vinnie prefers Facebook stories. No, he doesn't care what you think about it.
"This is gonna get so many likes..."
He continues to watch and record, even as nearby firemen arrive and douse the inferno. They keep asking him to back away but he keeps inching forward to get the better angles. For the likes.
"Sweeeeet."
Eventually, the blaze is put to rest. The smoldering dumpster sends a chimney of smoke into the air as the firefighters disperse, leaving Vinnie alone again. He walks over to it, waving away the black fumes, and sticks his head over the rim.
"Oh hey! The Bombshell Title! Weird, what kind of ungrateful, petty, rude, twat would go out of their way to discard and destroy the title belt they earned as recognition from the fans and staff of the XWF? I mean, that's crazy. It reminds me of how once I got stuck with two deadbeat partners and ended up winning the Trios Titles with them, because duh, I'm really awesome... I pinned Sebastian Duke in that match by the way, don't ever forget that I'm totally undefeated against Duke. Azrael and Theo were in it too. They lost. I won. It was dope."
Vinnie cheeses for his cell camera for a moment, enjoying the memory.
"Anyway, I won those titles even though I didn't really care for them and never asked to be involved in a match for them in the first place... I guess I could have made up some lame name for them and tossed them in the garbage, but instead I wore all three belts proudly and made them important enough to become a focus of the company for the next few months. Crazy. It helped propel me to the top of the ranks back in 2014. Good times. I guess just taking a big shit on the entire thing is one way to go about it, though."
Vinnie leans in and rummages about, pulling out the mostly undamaged title belt. Leather and metal don't really burn that much, after all. And since the dumpster was outside of Shane Carver's window, it was mostly filled with dried asparagus and old potatoes. Not really high-yield for flashpoint temperatures, you know? There might also have been a sleeping hobo in there. That hobo might have been John Madison. We'll probably never know for sure.
"Well, maybe it's time we do something different with this here Bombshell Title. I guess people aren't thrilled about it. I mean, we've had some real megastars hold onto this thing... Azrael back when I was pretty sure he had a vagina or at least some sort of cloaca... Jenny Myst, the most important thing to ever show her face on Savage just ask her... Abigail, the first ever champ who's off busting her butt in the Lingerie Football League and making me a ton of merch dollars... but hey, these things happen. Times change. We can evolve the title just like we evolve everything else about the XWF! And that's exactly what we'll do. Thanks so much, Moxie! Your little baby tantrum really helped me realize we needed to do something different. This title is going to go through some changes and come out way better than it ever was before!"
Vinnie throws the smoking title belt over his shoulder and climbs back onto his Segway, spinning it around and preparing to head off. Before he leaves though, he winks into his cell cam and smiles.
"Oh, but Mox, you won't be invited to have anything to do with it. Or any other titles for the next 30 days at least. We only want champions who appreciate the honors we give them. Hopefully yopu evolve just like this championship will! See ya later!"
And with that, Vinnie heads off, sucking on his gigantic soda.
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Post by The Brothers Blackwater on Nov 14, 2018 7:25:37 GMT -8
All three of the Brothers Blackwater click like on Vinnie Lane's video on Facebook.
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Post by Azrael Erebus on Nov 14, 2018 8:13:04 GMT -8
Azrael finishes watching Lane's video, thinking fondly back to that Trio Title match and even remembers one of the promos that Vinnie shot for said match. He was so certain that the spaceman was haunting his dreams, he actually worked himself into a hysterical fit. It was quite funny. Maybe the man was having terrible dreams, but certainly not ones that were ever purposely invoked by the man from the stars. Azrael wouldn't have wasted his time on such things, he wasn't a witch after all. From there Vinnie would pin Duke and become one third of the Trio Champs, an honor that Azrael knew quite well. For he was a former three time Trio Champ. However, that was all besides the point... what was the point again? Oh yes, that Azrael fully agreed with and supported Vinnie's decision on both title and Moxie. Ugh... Moxie Monarch, such a chore of a woman. Far to old to be publicly throwing tantrums like some sort of college student, civil rights activist. What was she forty, she looked forty, even with all the make-up and concealer cream that she caked on. Though the spaceman was well over a thousand years old; himself, he didn't look it, not that it mattered cause the standard for his aging process worked differently than that of a human, plus he was a man and it's common knowledge men age better than women. As shown by Moxie's appearance.
Oh and Azrael clicks like on Vinnie's Facebook video, despite the fact that he doesn't even have a Facebook account himself. How? Well, if you have to ask that, than you don't know Azrael.
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Post by Gator on Nov 14, 2018 10:01:38 GMT -8
Gator chuckles in agreement watching Vinnies video, completely agreeing that the title doesn't make the champion but the champion makes the title and that Moxie is a bratty little scumbag.
He likes Vinnies video and shares it on his Piczo.
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Post by SBW - Smoking Bob Williams on Nov 14, 2018 11:05:28 GMT -8
Smoking Bob Williams has spent all night staring at footage from the ppv, and had his say about the opt-in site being hijacked by pent up frustrated opponents.Now he sitting there watching Moxie attempting to burn the Bombshell title and XWF'S Boss Man Vinnie Lane subsequent reply.He lights up a cigar, thinks for a moment, and pushes record on the promo video."Vinnie said it all." SBW sits back, smokes some more of his cigar, grabs his phone, finds Vinnies facebook account and pushes like.
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Post by Oliver Last on Nov 14, 2018 13:05:34 GMT -8
Oliver Last's reaction to Vinnie's video
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Post by engy on Nov 14, 2018 14:06:43 GMT -8
Engy looks on in horror at the blazing inferno.
MY FAVORITE DUMPSTER!!!
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Post by Vinnie Lane on Nov 14, 2018 16:18:11 GMT -8
Vinnie stops listening to Azrael's inner monologue after the only point that matters:
"Vinnie pinned Duke."
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